i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I think i peed on brittanys purse
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Everyone says I win the strip club
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
