i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
