So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Randomize
