I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
