Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
