We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
