remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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