Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize