weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Walk of Shame today included voting.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
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