Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
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