I can't watch pbs sober anymore
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Randomize
