her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize