I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
