I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
