So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
hell yes lets make some ravioli
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Congratulations! We have a period
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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