I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
