Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Randomize
