So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize