Well I left you a voicemail but you probably won't be able to hear it because my mic is fucked up. I think you need to come down here and take it in for me.
I hate this phone so bad I'm going to lose all of my friends because of it
Yeah...you probably will...
well, you're marked off my christmas card list for next year.
I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
