so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Randomize