i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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