i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
