If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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