I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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