He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
he shaved USA in his pubs
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
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