Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
29 “I’m Getting Old” Moments
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
19 Worst Song Lyrics of All Time
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex