Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
you never un-have a 4some