im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I have tasted many bathrooms
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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