You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
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Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
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You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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