No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
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