I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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