ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Randomize
