he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Randomize
