What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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