Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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