absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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