Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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