she woke up with a sticky ear
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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