1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
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