is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
