Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
God I need to hump something, right now.
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