Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
no you cant smoke seaweed
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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