The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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