My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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