come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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