I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
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