school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
