never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
