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By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
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