So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
