so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Randomize
