Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
